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For week 2 of CGI Jr Month, we explore games for olds: a MUCH easier Dark Souls, a game about Wonder Trading phone apps with your dad, and an-depth industry expose about the glaring lack of Monk video games.

Introduction

Griffin and Nick jump straight into their second CGI Jr category, "Games you can play with your grandparents".

This Episode's Game

why hasn’t anyone made a video game about the TV show Monk yet? (submitted by @kennardsmith)

Why Hasn't Anyone Made a Video Game About the TV Show "Monk" Yet? is a game about an investigative reporter at a video game website who is conducting an exposé into why Monk has never been adapted into a video game. By following a tip-off and pulling the right strings, the player uncovers a conspiracy in which nearly everyone in the video games industry has tried and failed to make a Monk video game; Pandemic Studios was working on a Monk game when they were shut down, TellTale Games' attempt was feature-complete before it was canned, and Warren Spector was fired by Disney before he could begin working on his dream project of Epic Monk. The dark secret which becomes revealed is that Tony Shalhoub has a strong aversion to being depicted digitally and that if a Monk game without his likeness was ever released, modders would insert a naked Tony Shalhoub to the game in retaliation.

Other Game Ideas Discussed

Wario, Beating Up Dinosaurs Outside Of Hell

WarioBeatingUpDinosaursOutsideOfHell

An image submission of Wario standing atop a pile of vanquished dinosaurs, choking a pterodactyl by the throat, with the above caption. This is a sequel to Mario Is Missing in which Mario goes on a rescue mission to bring back Wario from the depths of Hell. Halfway-through, it becomes apparent that Wario actually doesn't want to be rescued because he's having a good time autoerotically asphyxiating dinosaurs in Hell.

Wario's Repentance

While discussing the previous suggestion, Griffin suggests a game where Wario has to rebrand himself to avoid eternal damnation in Hell. (submitted by Griffin McElroy)

Wonder Trade But For Phone Apps

The player picks one of the apps installed on their phone and randomly swaps it with someone else's. Griffin receives Nick's Chick-fil-A One in return for his WWE 2K16 Creation Studio. Useful for getting dangerous apps away from your parents, but would eventually result in their phone losing all functionality.

Give me Dark Souls, but muuuch easier

A version of Wii Sports Resort in which the player bowls a spell down a hallway of skeletons. In Swordplay, the player automatically walks forward and uses 1:1 motion controls to knock down dragons and zombies (played by your friends) with a single touch of their sword. If the player dies, the words "That's OK" appears on the screen. (submitted by @megaspel)

John Krasinski knows how I'm going to die but God won't let him tell me directly

Griffin is certain that this suggestion was discussed in a previous episode. John Krasinski looks directly into the camera whenever anyone mentions food or choking during The Office. (submitted by @inzergue)

Trivia

  • The MTV blogpost by "Archive-Stephen-Totilo" about how Tom Cruise's likeness has never appeared in a video game can be read here.
  • Nick and Griffin give a shout-out to @Smelliott8, who had recently got a tattoo of the acronym "TMG'sWI?T:F" on his leg.

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